Confidence is how we build success in our lives. No matter how much ambition we have or how much intelligence we possess, without confidence we cannot do what we need to seize the things that rightfully belong to us and the future that we know that we deserve.
Confidence allows you to:
- Impress others at work and get the respect that you deserve.
- Meet new people, including those that may easily become close friends or romantic interests.
- Feel ready and open to new situations instead of intimidated by them.
When you lose your self confidence, or you find that you do not have the confidence you need to take advantage of the situation you are in, you can feel alone and isolated. Feelings of low self confidence can make one feel worthless or as though they are not worthy of the possibilities for them.
When you suffer from low self confidence, it is important that you do whatever you can to change it. There are a variety of ways that you can change your confidence levels over an extended period of time. Some of these methods include:
- Exercising More – When you are healthier and feel better about the way you look, confidence will follow. The more you exercise the more fit you will become, and some of the possible causes of low self-confidence will be eliminated.
- Fake It – By faking self confidence and forcing yourself to act confident even when you are terrified inside, you will quickly become used to the experience of acting confident in public and the emotions/anxiety that goes along with it.
- Write Down the Positive – Often times low self confidence is due to harmed/damaged self esteem. Part of that comes from focusing on all that can go wrong in any situation. Focusing on the negative can make you feel worse about yourself and less hopeful for the future. Instead, try to change your mind set by writing down all of the positives that come out of every situation, so you can see on paper all of the things that you have accomplished.
As you can see, the best ways to gain confidence in your life is to be prepared for various experiences and feel better about yourself as a person. By working on yourself and focusing on the positives in any situation, you will get used to how to it feels to have confidence and be ready to go during any situation.
How to Experience Confidence RIGHT When You Need It
All of the previous strategies are designed to help you slowly gain more confidence over time, allowing you to give yourself the assuredness you need to respond in any situation. Most of those are gradual and involve helping you feel better about yourself over time in order to give you the faith that you need to respond to any problems with certainty.
There is also, however, a proven method to help you gain confidence NOW – and one that you can employ in any situation that requires you to get yourself prepared to show conviction when you need it. That strategy is known as Anchoring.
What is Anchoring?
Based on proven principles of behavioural psychology, anchoring is the act of causing yourself to associate the emotions you get from a specific stimulus to an action that you undertake. It involves creating a conditioned response to help you overcome any problems with feelings of low self worth, and it allows you to harness those emotions in a moment’s notice.
How Does it Work?
Our minds are filled with associations. Think back to any time in your past, and it is bound to garner a variety of reactions to all of your senses. For example:
- First Date – Think back to how you felt on your first date. You likely remember the fear and anxiety so vividly you can still feel it. You probably also remember the happiness, awkwardness, and all of other emotions you experienced during that eventful night.
- Favourite Food – Think of your favourite food and you probably can feel the joy you get from eating it, as well as the smells, tastes, and other things that tickle your senses whenever you imagine the meal in front of you.
- Awkward Moment – We all experience awkward moments in our lives. If you think back to one of those moments, you no doubt still experience the same degree of awkwardness that you felt when the event occurred.
All of these serve as examples of how during the course of our lives we make connections between people, places and things, and these connections trigger responses that affect our emotions, our thoughts – even our bodies. These experiences have the ability to empower or disempower – motivate and de-motivate. Over the course of our lives, these anchors affect the way we subconsciously react to the events that occur to us over time, and the stimuli (and resulting thought) we experience.
How Can Anchors Help Us Gain Instant Confidence?
Every day you encounter various situations that stimulate an anchor. For example, perhaps you hear a song you used to enjoy back in school, and you hear the song on the radio, taking you back to the emotions you felt during your early education.
Most of the time the triggers for these anchors are not under your control. They are simply things you encounter every day, and they bring the emotions to the forefront automatically. But if you can create your own stimuli in order to access one of these anchors, then the emotions and energy you get from these anchors can be harnessed for your own personal use at a moment’s notice. That is how anchoring can help you create instant confidence for yourself wherever and whenever you need it.
Anchoring Your Self Confidence
Anchoring your self confidence is easy, and once completed it will allow you to give yourself the self confidence you need in an instant. To start the anchoring process, you must do the following.
- Decide Your State – The first step is to decide what state of being you want for yourself. In this case, you are trying to anchor self confidence. All you need is a single word, such as “Confident,” and you are ready to move on to the next step. Only anchor one of these states/emotions at a time.
- Recall the Emotion – The next step is to recall a specific time that you experienced the emotion that you are trying to anchor. In this case, that emotion is self confidence, so think back to a specific time in your life when you experience a great deal of self confidence. Recall all of the confidence you felt and the feelings that you associated with that confidence and allow yourself to be affected by those feelings.
- Provide a Stimulus/Behaviour – Once you have found the trigger that brings you those feelings of confidence, it is time to associate that with a stimulus in order to trigger that response again in the future. An example of such a trigger would be touching your left knuckle with your right hand or clenching and unclenching a fist. The trick is to make it an easy to perform behaviour so that you can do it whenever, wherever you need to gain confidence. Once you have associated the action with the memory, you will find that simply by performing the behaviour, you will be able to access the emotion you desire – in this case, self confidence.
- Change Your State – The next step is to change your state and feel something other than the confidence you are feeling. Any state will do – whether it is happiness, sadness, or anxiety. You simply need to experience a new state to move on to the final step.
- Set Off Anchor – The last step is testing how well the anchoring has worked by performing the action (touching your knuckle or whatever stimulus you chose) and seeing if it is able to create the emotion that you tried to anchor.
Do not worry if it does not work the first time. Simply bring yourself back to the state (confidence), associate it with the behaviour/stimuli, and then try again. Quickly you will have conditioned the stimulus to respond with the emotion you are seeking.
Once the anchoring is completed, you will be able to use it in any situation when you need to feel self confidence. When your confidence is low, simply perform the anchored behaviour and you will stimulate the desired response, instantly giving yourself the confidence that you need.
Instant Self Confidence
Anchoring is a powerful tool for helping you achieve considerable life changes by altering your emotions to meet the needs of the situation. By anchoring your self confidence, you can access self confidence whenever you need it. And anchoring is not limited to self confidence either. Whether you need a way to trigger happiness, anger, excitability – any emotion can be anchored to a stimulus in order to alter your emotional state when you need it altered.
While it is useful for your self confidence to perform long term self esteem building exercises, anchoring has the power to generate instant self confidence that will benefit you in every situation. With anchoring, the world and everything you want in it is yours for the taking.
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